Wednesday, November 11, 2015

" degil "

my friend used to advice me before,, not only one but a few of my friends advised me not to spend more time with that person. They said many things that could possibly happened to me yet my heart was damn stubborn not to believe and listen to them. 

I told myself,, '' I know that person better, he is not like what you all think. I know he is kind and sincere to be my friend ''

I guess, I learnt the best lesson in my life. every words that my friends said to me turned out to be a reality. Umpama sumpahan yang betul-betul terjadi. 

Bukan aku tidak ingat mereka pesan : 

" you mean nothing to him, someday he will throw you away like a rubbish when you can no longer benefit him. he will simply forget and replace you " 

" don't let him treat you like this, treat you like an option. Kalau dia anggap kawan baik sekalipun bukan macam ni layanan dia pada kau. You only exist when he need something, trust me. Walk away please. " 

and bla bla bla. 

part paling aku ingat, bila Ash peluk aku sambil menangis sebelum kami berpisah, siap sempat pesan " Jangan cari shazryn lagi, you will get hurt " 

tapi aku degil. Aku lebih percayakan kata-kata sweet talker tu dari kawan-kawan yang sememangnya concern pasal aku. See what I get in the end. True old men say : love is blind. We are not blind physically, we were too blind to see the truth. 

I was hurt. again and again. then,, sendiri buat sendiri tanggung. sendiri cari penyakit, sekarang rasalah sakit dia tu kan... 

tak pe lah, selagi tak rasa sakit, aku tak akan pernah belajar kan. Untuk manusia yang degil seperti aku ni,, ni makan dia.. 

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